Paul Dennis Sporer / Writings / Articles

Christianity's Protection of Marriage
by Paul Dennis Sporer

One of the most common errors made about the vitality of the human Will is in relation to marriage; did previous generations find the process for the most part voluntary or involuntary? The prevailing attitude among modern laypeople is that it was the latter, that men and especially women were forced to marry against their will, having to do so in order to meet society's expectations of fulfilment of mother or father roles, to provide children for society's well-being, to become a productive, and honourable member of the community. One wonders, in light of the evidence of history, whether this is not some sort of psychological projection of our own age on that of our ancestors. That some were forced, coerced or cajoled into matrimony is beyond question, but there is no evidence whatsoever that in Christian European civilisation, there was any long-term, widely-accepted 'duty' to marry.

Most often, pressures to marry can be divided into four main categories: Economic rationality, pregnancy, family obligation, and cultural duty. The last is one of the easiest to ascertain, and it is the easiest to dismiss as a major factor. We know that traditionally the Roman Catholic Church and conservative Protestantism emphasised the absolute right of the individual to refuse marriage, and the absolute right to marry whomever he or she chose. The Council of Trent's Decree Concerning the Reform of Matrimony made a forceful statement about the illegitimate linkage of financial imperatives, social prestige and marriage:

'Worldly inclinations and desires very often so blind the mental vision of temporal lords and magistrates, that by threats and ill usage they compel men and women who live under their jurisdiction, especially the rich or those who expect a large inheritance, to contract marriage against their will with those whom these lords or magistrates propose to them. Wherefore, since it is something singularly execrable to violate the freedom of matrimony, and equally execrable that injustice should come from those from whom justice is expected, the holy council commands all, of whatever rank, dignity and profession they may be, under penalty of anathema to be incurred ipso facto, that do in any manner whatever, directly or indirectly, compel their subjects or any others whomsoever in any way that will hinder them from contracting marriage freely.'

Not only does this restate long-standing Church moral tenets on marriage, it also indicates that there were serious enough lapses to justify issuing this statement. Of course, if such restrictions were promulgated for the high and mighty, then they would apply to all the lesser classes as well. The latest revision of Canon Law is also passionate in its condemnation of any kind of persuasion which 'boxes in' a person, altering a person's life negatively with the only option being to marry that person or someone else. Canon 1103 states: A marriage is invalid if it is entered into due to force or grave fear inflicted from outside the person, even when inflicted unintentionally, which is of such a type that the person is compelled to choose matrimony in order to be freed from it.

What exactly 'force' or 'grave fear' means is not specified, but one could infer this applies to many typical forms of duress, including interminable nagging by a parent, if it causes ostracism, depression or other significant affliction that can only be alleviated by giving in to the persistent demands. Additionally, the Church has been so concerned with the freedom to enter into marriage, that even unintentional coercion makes the union invalid. As marriage was one of the most important decisions one could make in one's life, if not the most important, and happiness within it of paramount importance, any kind of pressure was unconscionable. Thus, the cultures of Europe, as they are derived in large part from biblical teaching, the canons of the Roman Catholic Church, the catechism, and the writings of the early Church Fathers, must have had an unequivocal adherence to the principle of free will.

Besides the proclamations of the Church, which found their way into the parishes, the common sayings of European peoples about marriage, love, husband, wife, and children, betray a concern with wise choice of marriage partner. Consequently, it was quite common to hear sayings that urged a delay in marriage, lest one make a grave irrevocable mistake. Indeed, why should anyone be urged to do something unless he or she maintained a viable decision making capacity in the matter? On the other hand, opinions such as 'everyone should marry, if they're normal' did not become common until the 20th century, indicating a decline in the respect for individual choice.

As for the pressure to marry due to economic reasons, here there is evidence of conditions that favour late marriage. When real wages are compared to crude marriage rates in the early modern period, we find that the tendency to marry was predicated on changes in the economy. The better the economy, the earlier the marriage; the worse the economy, the later the marriage. However, as we do not see any inflexibility on the upward or downward side throughout this period, we conclude that people were not innately more inclined to marry or not to marry. Further, personal choice still prevailed in many cases. Although economic factors clearly influenced the decision to marry, it was not dominant, and there were many who went against the trend. In fact, during the steep declines in income of the period from about 1751 to about 1771, most people in England went ahead and married early, and during the periods of improving economy of 1625 to 1671, and 1820 to 1840, most failed to react swiftly and delayed. These periods of counter-trend behaviour, when so many people quite deliberately married in the midst of a clearly slumping economy, is hard to understand, but does not diminish the strong larger conventional trend. Hence, although the economy had a major influence in the decision to marry, it was by no means absolute. Individual free will still prevailed.

It is easy to say that pregnancy was not a factor in rushing marriage as illegitimacy rates, with some exceptions, were low until the 20th century, and pre-nuptially conceived births were also quite uncommon. Finally, much more difficult to gauge is 'family pressure', but if folk sayings are an indication of family disposition, then we can determine that family pressure was not overwhelming, although certainly was greater than that passed on by the community.

In general, people of the past indeed had the ability to make up their own minds about marriage, based on cultural, religious, and economic decisions. There was an expectation that the individual would carefully deliberate this decision, not rush into it on account of the push from mother or father, or the pull of infatuation, status, sexuality or financial advancement. We might ask the question, why would some cultures have a low opinion of marriage, as preserved in their aphorisms, when they undoubtedly had periods when married life was quite good, that is during times of lower mortality, economic growth, older age of first marriage? We might say that most people had a good opinion of the higher concept of marriage, which they attempted to implement, but might have had a poor opinion of the marriages that they saw in their own communities. Perhaps it was this high valuation of the ideal of 'Marriage' that made people react quite negatively to the reality of 'marriage' when they witnessed people misuse this institution. Caution about personal decisions was urged in order to preserve the ideal, since without the ideal, marriage itself will be reduced to nothing more than a fad.

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